Depression is not a cupcake. I'm sending cupcakes anyways.

Depression is not cupcakes.

I recently watched a video on Facebook where a guy told me my problem was IDENTIFYING with depression. Depression comes and goes but I'm still here, so I'm not depression, so stop saying you're depressed and you won't be. Are you as confused as I am? Depression is like diabetes, a MEDICAL reality, not a psychic one, as much as gurus would like so many of us believe.

However. The skilled person can do quite a lot while depressed. Why, right now I am roasting a chicken, and I just made instant chocolate pudding. Now that I learned we can no longer eat raw batter,* I scraped and licked the pudding from the bowl with more gusto than usual. I rarely have milk in the fridge, so who knows when the pudding mix is from, but it was delish, and now I have some pudding for another day, as licking the bowl was enough for me, thank you very much.

This weekend, I entertained my parents for Saturday dinner and Sunday breakfast. I showed off the latest progress in my apartment. (It no longer looks like a hoarder starter home.) It is still clutter-y, but we are making progress. After breakfast at Denny's, my folks and I went to church. I have returned to the Open Door,** after at least 5 years of being away. So it's a reunion every Sunday, people that didn't know I'm back, lots of great hugs, plus all the new people that have joined in the past 5 or more years. I've started hanging with a crowd that goes to lunch after church after Sunday, the "brunch crowd," and oh by the way, for July 4th, a new friend invited me to her house for Sunday dinner. Let's see. That's four "social events" already. Then my dear cousin Harold texts me Sunday afternoon, stopping through Pittsburgh, shall we eat a meal? Yes, let's do breakfast! It was so wonderful to spend some time with him and his two daughters, Hannah and Sarah. Harold is one of the most comfortable people I know.

Big accomplishment of the day: I finished Notorious RBG, (for a book club, or I would not have finished it) which was interesting because of the subject matter, but since this was really my first intro to the work of Ruth Bader Ginsberg, (yes, really),  the non-chronological scattered text was not helpful. I was SO GLAD to be done reading it! I skimmed a lot. I decided, since parking was FREE thanks to the HOLIDAY, to read for a while at what some of my friends call "Hogworts,"or what I call (by its actual name) the Cathedral of Learning, one of the classrooms for the University of Pittsburgh. *I* never had a class there. I finished the book sometime around noon.

I came home, ate leftovers, for lunch and napped all afternoon. Then I tried to read a drug store novel, blech, and then I went through each of the 15 library books stacked near my steps and decided that each one was too taxing on my brain and resolved to return each and every one to the library, tomorrow.

Right now I'm waiting for my chicken to "rest" so I can dig in, and I'm making some rice. I suppose I'll put together some veggies and a salad, even.

So, even though my brain does not have the power to read Vogue magazine at the moment, or any of the 15 or so books that are going back to the library tomorrow, I am still able to send you cupcakes and write a blog post. I am grateful.

One of the things I loved about RBG is that she was quick to be slow about things. Let's not rush. People aren't ready yet for that big idea, let's do this other thing and when wait on this one. I will search out more information about her, and I look forward to trying to say something intelligent at Book Club on Thursday night. I'll be making a cake between now and then. Lemon Pound Cake, glazed, my new favorite cake. (Yes, though I "send cupcakes," I prefer making actual cakes, go figure.)

Have a happy rest of the Fourth, and here, have a cupcake!

______________________
*Consumer Updates: Raw Dough's a Raw Deal and Could Make You Sick, fda.gov
**The Open Door is a Presbyterian (PCUSA) Church of which I was a charter member, located at the corner of Garfield, East Liberty, Highland Park and Morningside. (Someone will correct me on the last neighborhood if I'm wrong).